Dear Roger: Second Verse, Same As The First

Well, I finally let the kids nagging wear me down and I went to see a doctor. I went to a new one because I prefer a doctor that actually will talk to me instead of at me, but DAMN! I didn't expect a doctor that would take a bite out of my ass and then give me a talking to like she was twice my age instead of half of it. By the time I managed to escape I was shy about half a gallon of blood and had another damn MRI scheduled to be followed with all kinds of other unpleasant tests and then a follow up appointment all happening within a couple weeks instead of a couple of months like I am used to! I didn't even get to try to use the excuse of no transportation or poor scheduling, they had the appointments scheduled on my days off and transport arranged if I needed it.
Im not looking forward to go starting up all this crap again, but  guess I have to figure something out about why some of the things have gotten worse and why I am not writing. My vision has gone to hell. When I had my eyes checked, the optometrist said that while my eyes looked healthy, my left eye was profoundly weaker than my right, and my vision had significantly weakened since my last appointment. That is seriously NO BUENO for a writer. The left side weakness goes along with my left hand not being as strong and the fact that I limp a bit on my left side. But I get right sided cluster migraines, so that actually makes sense.
They are doing the MRI looking for changes and growth or any weirdness since the last studies and then depending on what that shows, they will proceed with the rest of the bullshit that I hate so much and dread. For someone with as many tattoos as I have you would think I would be okay with needles, but when they are going into your spine and your nerves and then have electrical impulses shot through them, well...that just kinda takes the suck fest to a whole nuther level.
It would be nice to find out why I cant gain weight and why I have no appetite or desire to write or why my tinnitus is out of control lately, but I don't expect Ill get any answers any better than I got the last go round. They give me the,'Well, we THINK it might be... or it could be..." and then they throw a ton a pills at me and tell me to come back over and over for more tests until I snap and decide life is tolerable as it was.  The reason I am going now is because I haven't been writing or eating and I cant see for shit and  that's not a good thing, its had my son worried, so I went for him, and to get him off my case and because I cant really tell an 8 from a 0 anymore or a period from a comma unless I have my screen blown up to grandma level.
I have new glasses coming in a week or so and that should help. I'm trying to get out a little to see if I can find some motivation to get me writing, but so far nada.
We got a new pup and he seems to be the one thing that keeps me busy and makes me laugh.
Benny is quite a character and for some reason he took to me and as I write this hes doing his level best to get between the keyboard and my lap so he can shove my computer off my lap. Hes already spoiled rotten and he spends most of his awake time stuffed in my jacket getting carried around like an extra kid.
Its not too cold up here yet so I have been enjoying getting out and walking around in the rain some, but there are days I long for a car so I could just get in it and drive to the coast or somewhere out of the city for just an hour or two to see if I could find my muse...its been so damn long since I have escaped.