We went with Sus and family down to Sweet Home as part of their church based stuff, and I should have gotten a clue what kind of day it was going to be when I realized that not only was it the same day as the Spencer Bell Legacy concert that was going to be live streaming, so I was going to miss most of it including the early 100 Monkey performances, but that my cell phone charger hadn't been plugged in all the way and my phone only had a couple of bars of juice, so if I could get the concert on my phone, it would probably kill it by mid-day. If that wasn't bad enough, then a delivery I was expecting to arrive on Sunday, was actually scheduled for yesterday as well and a bunch of juggling had to be done to get that handled, so it was hassle after hassle and we hadn't even left Gresham!
When Sus came and picked us up, I ended up sitting in the back seat of the Durango and we headed down through Clackamas. Normally a drive like that would not be a problem, but three things were wrong with that little venture, namely; Durango, back seat, Clackamas. The road from Gresham to Clackamas is a twisty, turning, hilly, driving adventure and in a Durango, which can be vomit inducing on a straightaway, its misery. By the time we reached the city limits I was an interesting shade of green and Sus was offering to pull over so I didn't barf in her truck. The boys that were with us were in almost as bad as shape as me, and we ended up having to put down all the windows and she had to slow down on the curves. It was rough!
Soo, we got to Clackamas, picked up a 10 passenger van with seats designed to kill asses, and foolishly letting the boys take the back section of the van, we headed out towards the 5.
During the trip, the boys graciously decided to entertain us with songs from pretty much any weird youtube video you could think of including "A Mysterious Ticking" to the point that I felt I had to retaliate with the Robot Chicken theme, earning the vitriol from all the adults in the van with us.
The trip down was not too bad and I got to see parts of Oregon I haven't seen before, and luckily, other than my sanity being a little impinged upon, I survived intact. We got to the church and I wandered off to look around the grounds, and I found copious amounts of blackberry bushes! Since I normally wear jeans, boots and longer sleeves, I was able to wade right in and pick the bigger, riper ones and pass them back to those who had worn shorts or lighter pants, including Sus and her dad. The boys were roughhousing and stealing berries from each other until they heard Sus's dad say ,"Its a good thing Jen wears boots and all that denim, she can really get up deep into the bush and get the good stuff." Silence fell for about 30 seconds and the implications of what was about to happen flickered across the faces of 3 teen boys,myself, and Sus. Her father is rather oblivious and had no idea the glorious double entendre that he had just given the boys and as I raised an eyebrow at him, (thus resulting in an explosion of hysterical laughter from the boys), he just looked at them and asked,"What? Did somebody get a worm?" I just came back out of the bushes and headed to the van trying not to die laughing each time I looked at her dad for the rest of the day.
We left the church and headed out to just do some touristy stuff and we ended up at a place called,'Green Peter" dam. I have to wonder, were the folks who named stuff up here in Oregon all British? There are more places with names that are giggle worthy up here than anyplace I have ever lived and have to be inspired by all kinds of perversity, you got Couch that is pronounced 'Cooch" and Green Peter? Wouldn't you know, "Green Peter" is where things started to go really wrong for me? We drove across the dam and on reaching the far side, the kids decided to shoot off along the trail, seeing a place to get close to the water, and being after adventure myself, and also being a bit of a worrying mom, I went after them even though I was wearing leather soled cowboy boots. I was doing good until Stevie started getting really close to a sharp drop off over some rocks, and then I was paying more attention to her and not where the hell I was walking, and I managed to step on a part of the embankment that was weak and it gave way, taking my goofy ass down hard, with no warning. I landed on my left elbow and butt cheek, on a rock and my shoulder promptly slipped right the hell out of socket,(it does that every now and then), and then the embankment kept crumbling so I had to dig my right heel in and throw myself back onto my side a little further up the hill and that jammed my left wrist. My sons friend who I call,'Sparky" saw the wreck happen and I could tell he wanted to laugh but he was also a little freaked out. I told him, make sure Stevie doesn't come down here, and you might wanna get back because I may puke when I put my shoulder back in,(I didn't), but it hurt like hell and made me say words that a good little church going boy shouldn't hear. Once it slipped back into place, I assessed the rest of the damage, and I realized that I was pretty wrenched feeling and I was scuffed up, dirty and embarrassed to death, but I was alive and not in the damn cold water, so it was actually a win. I hobbled back to the van, rounding up the kids as we went, and enduring the jokes and comments about the new hole in my favorite dark jeans and the scuffs all over my good boots, including my own sons smart ass comment that if I wasn't wearing boots I probably wouldn't have fallen, to whit I replied, 'No, I probably would a gone in the damn lake because I damn sure cant walk in anything else." I guess I cant walk in boots this weekend either though, because when we got back to town and went to drop off the van, I managed to fall, sideways!, down 5 steps at the front of the church, further twisting the crap outta my knee and wrenching my whole body, so I am feeling all kinds of pain in interesting places. An assessment when I got home revealed a really epic bruise on my butt, a knee that looks like someone took a ball bat to it, a bruised up elbow and shoulder and a left arm that I cannot raise past chest level, so pretty much all I did the rest of the evening was throw myself a pity party.
Did get a bit lucky when I got home, the concert was not totally over and I actually caught the 100 Monkeys last performance and HOLY HELL! It was a scorcher. Chance was sitting out here in the living room, kinda sorta listening to it, and watching from time to time while he talked to his friends online and got things for me. He only listens to me and my stuff with about half an ear most of the time, caught up in his own emo/angsty teen stuff, and he knows most of the song lyrics to the 100 Monkeys songs just because he has heard them soo much since he has been home, but when the song,'Strangers" started up, he turned and looked at me with his jaw just hanging open in shock. The fact that I probably had a similar expression was not lost on him, and when I burst out laughing, he blushed and muttered about the fact that ,"Most normal moms would be freaking out over that kinda song, my moms probably gonna make it her ringtone"(not true) but I did like the raw, directness of the song, and truthfully, it kinda stuck me a lot like seeing a puppy baring its teeth, cute...but you wanna still just roll em over and rub their tummies because you know they are all growl. The song that really got my attention of the night was 'Joygasm". That is the song that is supposed to be their ,made up on the spot, song of the night that the audience gives them the idea for. Young Mr. Rathbone really knows how to work the audience, and he didn't let them down with this song, but what amused me, was the fact the lyrics were kinda wide open for interpretation. I enjoy his showmanship,(the boy moves like water in a hot skillet), and hes brilliant, leaving not only the girls in the audience needing a cold shower, but the boys as well. It was a great show for a good cause, I wish I could have caught more of it, and perhaps next year I will be able to be there in person, unless of course I manage to break my neck falling over air or something.
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