Dear Roger:Revocation of A Man Card, and As Good as I Once Was

Today started off with a groaned out,"Fuuuuuuuuucccccckkkkk." and an attempt to bury my head under the pillow until I realized I could not breathe,followed by the sound of the reason I could not breathe, the damn landscapers were back, mowing and hedging and blowing crap all over the place until my once hibernating allergies had come back to very angry and surly life. I felt much like I would have felt as a younger woman fresh from a concert and night of drunken debauchery, but there was a couple of things missing! Mainly the drunken and the debauching, there was nary a willing young man to debauch to be found and I was home and sober and behaving by no later than 9pm, so as best I can figure is,I just overdid it a bit with the move of all the furniture the other day and then hiking all over hell and half of Portland finally caught up with me. Plus I didn't eat or drink anything but 3 cups of coffee from 0900 in the morning until 9pm that night, except for a couple of slugs of Dr. Pepper and a couple of slugs of water, so I was a bit dehydrated and hungry. Carrying Stevie a couple of blocks didn't do me any favors either, because she may be a tiny little thing, but she is freaking solid and almost half my body weight!

I discovered that I need a little more padding on my scrawny ass before I go sitting on wooden beams for an extended period of time, especially if my goofy ass is going to be jamming and dancing about, because I have very interesting bruises on both lower butt cheeks and its not a lot of fun to try and sit on a hard surface.

Today was mostly spent laying around being a slug and talking to family and rubbing a very jealous nieces nose in Stevie's little moment, though not too meanly though, I did send her a copy of the picture and a few of the concert pictures, because Bailey Joe was the one that was the first fan in the family, and as tall as that girl is getting, I dont want to be on her bad side because she is as mean as a broke backed snake and if we go back to Texas for a family reunion, she might just kick my ass, she is after all,my sisters daughter and she comes by all that meanness honestly. Her question was,"Waaallll Helll Aunty Jen, Why didn't you just grab him up and toss him in the truck and bring him on round here, hes not so very big, you coulda took em." To which I replied,"One-Stevie would kicked my ass, Two-BAILEY JOE! Does your momma know you talk that way? Three- No truck" and she just busted out laughing and said,'Of Course my momma knows I talk this way, where they heck do you think I learned it?" We had a good chat back and forth for a bit and then I went and just hung out in my bedroom for big chunk of the day until Chance got home.

My son wasn't in much better shape and he complained that not having money to eat or drink all day before the concert really sucked, and I agreed with him, so my number one project this next week is to close out my old bank account and keep my ex from having any access to it at all so we dont get caught short like that ever again. I would have loved to have gotten Stevie a t-shirt at the concert, but that was impossible and I kinda resent my ex for that, as well as costing me the ability to take her to dinner, so I am fixing the problem once and for all. Hes going to have to manage to take care of his bills on his own because I have bills I have to take care of and I cannot support him. I made it on my own, supporting 4 kids and a vastly more expensive house payment, so he needs to man up.

Speaking of,'Manning up" pooor Chance, we may butt heads pretty hard, but we always seem to be able to tease and joke with each other pretty easily in the good times, and when he got back today I started right back in on him. Soo son, get your "Man Card" re-validated by hanging out with your buddies and beating on rocks and sticks? "Shut up! Mom! Jeesh, that crap wasn't funny, and I still do not believe you that you didn't know there weren't gonna be any guys there!" But son, there were guys there the fellas in the band are guys and then there were those two guys in front of us,oh wait, never mind the two guys in front of us, but the guys in the band were there, but wait a minute, I want to make sure you are clear after that whole "Criminal Minds" episode..."JESUS!!! MOM!!!! STOP!!!! OH.MY.GOD!!!! Im leaving, im going to Susan's, shes not so weird." Im just saying son, he is a cute lil thing and if your feeling confused there are... 'MOM! SHUT UP!! OMG! I have teased him off and on all day, though its been on a wide variety of topics related to the whole day. But I could not resist getting him on the whole masculinity worry one more time this afternoon when he came walking into the living room,scratching and burping and trying to act all caveman, guylike until I went to change the channel off,"Icarly"."Why are you changing the channel?" Because "Icarly" is coming on and your sis is busy reading to her stuffies and doesn't care. " Well, I wanna watch it, thats like one of my favorite shows". Say what? "I love that show, its cool." And then it dawned on him what he had just admitted, and to whom he had just admitted it to. Just hand it over. "What?" Your man card, and dont you ever bitch at me again about going to a concert I pick, because I will out you on every single social media/networking/teen place in existence as an "Icarly" fan the minute you do.