Coming Out

There are secrets that a person keeps because revealing them to those who know the person, can cause embarassment, shame and even loss of status, and I have been keeping a secret, a deep, dark, secret that only a select few close to me know the depth and depravity of,and the lengths to which I have gone to not only indulge my passion, but to protect the secret so as not to cause embarassment to those who love me. I have decided to reveal my secret because keeping it has become too complicated and difficult, and because I have discovered that there are more of my kind than there are of those who would shame and humiliate me. I revealed myself to my son, and while a bit reticent and chagrined, he is supportive and willing to support me, oddly enough, my eldest daughter was the least supportive and the most scornful,even denigrating me and using insults and disparaging names for my particular group.
I have never been one to be fearful or seeking of acceptance, but this is so shocking and such an abnormality, that I have held back and watched from the wings as the movement spread, and it has reached the point that I have decided to step forward and admit who I am, who I have become, and I can only hope that Ali will forgive and that my son wont be too embarassed, but I have joined the ranks of the Twilight fans, and I am firmly Team Edward.
Yes friends, I resisted as long as I could, but when you live a life as devoid of romance and passion as I have, even a compensated psychopath starts to look good. I have read the books, I own the movie, and I am planning on dragging my poor son to the premier of Eclipse in June. Its fun, its harmless, and its like cotton candy for the middle aged brain. Edward is something that I have never, and will never, have, a man that loves purely and truely, albiet obsessively. When you reach my age and you realize that you have never been loved, its like a sucker punch to the heart, so you have to live vicariously. I like the books, the movies are fun and I like the fact that they arent so violent and full of sex and filty language, they are subtle and full of romance. I have very little in my life that makes me happy,mainly my life is lived for my kids and its work, work, work for them all day long, with no escape from the constant stress, to the point of chest pains, and it was that stress and lonliness and chest pains that made me retreat to the books.
I dont own any t-shirts or posters or anything like that, but I confess, I have perused the posters a few times and that Kellan Lutz...mmm!